FREN← The path· Tool · completes “The First Hours” and “Preparing the Service”
This list gathers the practical matters of stages 1, 2, 4 and 5. Tick as you go ; fill in the blanks (contacts, dates).Hand it, if possible, to the family’s level-headed relay— not to those most stricken.
To be adapted to your country : legal formalities, delays, fees and customs vary from place to place. Fill in the local contacts and rules below. One useful universal rule : compare, and do not overpay— respect is not measured by expense.
1 · At the death (the first hours)
Confirm the death & obtain the required medical document
Tell the close family and friends (share out the calls)
Appoint the relay who will carry the paperwork :
Contact the funeral home / funeral service :
Arrange care for the children, meals, the welcome of visitors
If the death was far away : begin the repatriation (delay :)
2 · The decisions
Place of the service : church home funeral home —
Date & time (reckoning with the delay, autopsy, family far away) :
Burial : place / plot :
Coffin / arrangements (according to the wishes of the deceased & the family’s means)
Pallbearers :
A wake ? yes no — place & organisation :
Cremation : the Adventist Church has no theological position on cremation — it is a matter of custom, not of doctrine (see “ Preparing the Service ”). For plainness and for the rest, the Church Manual and the family’s wishes decide.
3 · The obituary
Items to gather :
Name, age, place of residence
Date, place and (if useful) cause of death
Date & place of birth, parents
Life : studies, work, service, places lived, marriages
Survivors (spouse, children, close relatives) and those who died before
Date, time & place of the service ; any gifts in memory
4 · The service
Outline of the order of service written & shared (see “Preparing the Service”)
Eulogy / life story gathered (see “The Sermon & the Eulogy”)
The prayer of the service : thought through beforehand, not improvised. Promise nothing you cannot keep ; make no comfort depend on the family’s faith ; let the lament come in. (See Facing Suffering.)
Those taking part : reading· prayer· eulogy
Music /hymns checked(see “Hymns and Funerals”) :
Printing of the order of service / song sheet
5 · The cemetery
Coordination with the funeral home for the transfer
Form of committal chosen (believer / faith unknown — see “The Committal”)
Texts ready : 1 Thess 4:13-18 · 1 Cor 15:51-55
A brief service planned (above all in bad weather)
6 · Papers & afterwards
Documents to deal with : death certificate, bank, insurers, employer, pensions, subscriptions
Local contacts / formalities :
Set up the follow-up : day 7 · month 1 · month 3 · month 6 · month 12 (see “Walking with Them After”)
Give the bereaved the Deuilmètre if it is right to do so